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Evelyn and I will be traveling to the city of Funchal on the island of Madeira off the coast of Africa today on a house hunting expedition.  We have determined that this is the best place in the world to be following the nuclear war that will follow the annexation of Estonia by Vladimir Putin.  Thank you President Trump.  You were right: Only you, alone, could do this.

The prevailing trade winds will keep the radioactive fallout at least 1,000 miles to the north.  Where better to while away our retirement years than a 35-mile by 14-mile volcanic island with lush vegetation, cows, lovely scenery, and a huge supply of fresh fish and wine.  There will be no need for street lamps in Funchal.  All the inhabitants will glow in the dark after several months of eating the fresh fish.

The Stakes Are Too Hight To Stay Home

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